EDST scholarly, book

It's that time again.

It's time for Elder Days Story time to resume.

With the new season, we are proud to bring you a new format!

First, I'd like to introduce our new staff artist, Marika Purisima, called "Meeks" around the studio because, well, she's meek. The studio pays her much more than it pays me, so treat her with according respect. I hear she got written into the will of the Earth, too, so that's another reason to stay on her good side.

Secondly, I'm sorry to say that the trial of figuring out how to post the new content to LiveJournal has defeated me. I don't think I'll move site any time soon, but it's become necessary to outsource a bit.

And so, combining thesis and antithesis into glorious synthesis, we give you . . . a hyperlink!

As I did last time, the first entry to this new domain is a rehash of old content. But have faith, gentle readers. Next week, a show of astronomic scope!

Oh, the monies!

The subprime mortgage crisis has claimed its latest victim: Bear Stearns, one of the world's largest investment banks, has in scarcely a year gone from Fortune's "Most Admired Company" to Wall Street's "Most Likely to Single-handedly Crash the Whole Goddamned Market as Mortgage Securities Become Worthless."

Quoth the Economist:

"In a dramatic move on Friday March 14th, the Federal Reserve Bank of New York and JPMorgan Chase made emergency funding available to Bear Stearns after other market players lost confidence in the beleaguered investment bank as a trading partner. As the credit crunch has deepened and broadened, the worst fear of many on Wall Street has been the collapse or forced rescue of a big bank or broker. That moment is now upon them."

Now JP Morgan Chase has announced that, pending shareholder approval, they will purchase Bear Stearns for $236 million, or less than the rent on Bear Stearns's office space.

With such a major crisis just when it seemed we were seeing the bottom of this particular economic well, a question must be asked: Shouldn't an investment bank be named "Bull Stearns"? Isn't a company named "Bear Stearns" just asking for it?

-- Boozin' and losin'
EDST wily

Paint and Islanders

I appreciate the occasional question that exceeds my boundaries, because it makes me expand my horizons in order to answer it properly. If it happens too often, though, I might meet my limits. I'm only human, after all, no matter what certain of my ex-lovers might tell you.

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Chromatically Yours,
Elder Days Story Time
EDST scholarly, book

Elder Days Story Time's Frequently Asked Questions

Sorry folks, I've not been feeling very author-y lately. Expect crazy editing of this article as the facts and my perception of them change, and as my hummus levels increase. For now, just the F.A.Q.'s, ma'am.

Where am I and why am I here?
You're in the Internet, and presumably on the planet Earth. As for why, I wrote a column about that. Check it out.

Where are all the articles? I can only see, like, three.
When people submit questions, the answer will usually be the first comment. If I'm writing the article myself (O rare portent), I'll usually hide most of it behind a cut for the sake of my subscribers' friends pages. Yes, this means you have to click to read my stuff. This is the Internet; one click more or less does not a huge difference make.

Are we there yet?
No. Learn to enjoy the journey; the destination is really no great shake.

Do I need a LiveJournal account to ask a question?
No. You do need to get in touch with me somehow, but this is not terribly difficult. I take requests through every input channel I've got. Nobody's tapped one out against my proprioceptive sense, but I'm sure it's only a matter of time. From some of the reader input I've been getting, I'm tempted to just incorporate all the LJ requests into me-penned articles anyway, but for now laziness prevails.

Scooby Doo, where are you?
Rhere is no Rooby-Doo, onry Zuul!

Why LiveJournal, anyway? You could make your own website to do this sort of thing much better.
You might be able to. I'm old and crusty and have the opposite of web-savvy. LJ provides a user-friendly, not-too-obnoxious framework that almost sort of fits my needs, and requires no coding efforts from me. Any fans who want to whip me up a delightful website for hosting on Nearly Free Speech or something, feel free, but I doubt it'll happen soon. I can't even get a proper logo on the budget I've allocated.

That reminds me: Open call for fanart! I really need a well-designed banner graphic and maybe some user icons, but any kind of submission has a decent shot of starring in some future incarnation of the site. Get creative, and contact me if you want a starting point or more details. Good luck, and thank you!

Lasagne Asgard

By "popular" demand, tonight's Elder Days Story Time has a decided culinary bent. I'll be teaching you how to make the pasta of the gods, a delicious, dense, sweet lasagna well-suited to mead, Maredsous, and Dr Pepper. Credit goes to fellow oracle and vastly superior journalist Ben Hutchins, for the bones and soul of the recipe, and to my Uncle Njord, for flavor and substitution advice.

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Seconds-Cravingly Yours,

Elder Days Story Time